Thursday, December 2, 2010

Those Nutty Kids

Quick!  I've got to get down to the grocery store and stock up on nutmeg before the feds decide to make it a controlled substance.


Yessir, just in time for the holiday season, nutmeg is apparently the latest way to get high:

Hot on the heels of this week's recall of Whole Foods-labeled nutmeg over salmonella fears, a TV station in New Hampshire reports that some wise-acre kids in Oklahoma are Beavising it up by smoking nutmeg, posting videos of it on YouTube, vomiting and discussing how awesome it is.  The newsfolk at WMUR-TV present a pragmatic take on the issue. "Certainly they will get the hallucinations that they're looking for, but the side effects, particularly the upset stomach and vomiting, prevents them from wanting to do it again. In fact, I've never heard of anyone trying it who wants to try it again," says some guy who is never identified but seems to know what he's talking about.

Apparently it's not all that "new" either - Malcolm X wrote in his autobiography of getting high in prison on nutmeg.  Kids are smoking, snorting and eating nutmeg as a "legal" high.

Just like  Four Loko, so goes nutmeg.  How long before I'm having to go to Criag's List to get my nutmeg so I can make fruitcake cookies? 
Damn those nutty kids.


Steve said...

Oh great! Pat has hidden the nutmeg from me. Honest honey, I want some to spice up my eggnog.

Jazz One said...

If they outlaw nutmeg, only outlaws will have nutmeg.

Bartender Cabbie said...

I'm going to the store. Now!!

Charlene said...

OMG this is funny.

btw, I have a 16 oz jar of nutmeg a friend brought over the other day and asked me to put in my pantry behind the cans of V-8 and bags of sugar. NOW I find out why!

SMILE = tongue planted firmly in cheek, the left one.

RP Free Speech said...

I soooo totally agree with 'Jazz One'!

BTW, I just bought (yesterday) a pound of ginger root to help my osteoarthritis. I'm told it's better than any drug to relieve a lot of the pain.

Questions in my mind:

Will I be arrested for 'harboring' a substance that Obamacare does not approve?

Will I not be able to sprinkle nutmeg on my eggnog (after I've added an overly generous amount of legal brandy?

Have the citizens of the United States become soooo complacent that they will bend to the self-appointed, though fat-lipped, Messiah's (and his ugly wifey's) will?

What the hell is is my water, which I faithfully filter, here in Chicago, that could produce such a 'gruesome two-some' as the Obamas?

Hutch said...

I need extra income. How much can I sell a "lid" of nutmeg for?

Jazz One said...

RP Free Speech, I was happy there for a moment seeing someone agreed with me here, then you had to turn this into some Obama hate.
I tried to find anything that connected Obama and nutmeg. Other than him being President while these news stories were done, I don't see any other connection.
If you have a flat tire on the way to work, is that Obama's fault?
If the elevator closes just as you get to it, is that Obama's fault?
If you step in dog poop, is that Obama's fault?
If teens in Oklahoma are getting high on nutmeg, is that Obama's fault?
I do find it kind of funny that it is in Oklahoma. Oklahoma is to Texas as Arkansas is to Louisiana.
Hutch, I'll meet you behind the building to get a lid of nutmeg. Its got to be the good stuff and not that Kroger brand nutmeg.
Have a blessed day y'all.

Laurence L. said...

More income discrimination: back in the high school years when we took the high in HS seriously, the ones with less cash in their pockets for the real thing were using nutmeg as a cheap substitute for some Arkansas dirt bud or better some Oaxacan is not anything new.

Definitely not a fill in for haze or window pane either. Fast times at Jesuit High, up on the roof basking in the sun, some good wine to we got away with it I'll ever know. It was an exclusive club, members thrown out of all the other HSs in town, welcomed to that little fraternity.

Laurence L. said...

Hey Jazz One, actually, all the things you list are not BHOs fault--in his administration they would all be Bush's fault.

Now wouldn't they?

Jazz One said...

Sometimes it seems like anything and everything that happens during the administration of a president you didn't vote for is attributed to that president.
It seems like the same dance, different tune.
The older I get, the more I find myself going back to those lessons I learned from my parents. "If lil Johnny jumps off a bridge, doesn't mean you should too."
Republican were in power for a long time. They treated Dems like a little brother. Dems whined about it, I admit it. When the Dems were voted into power, instead of keeping it classy, they went into whiny little brother mode. I just don't care for whining, left or right. Michael Moore is Glen Beck. Glen Beck is Michael Moore. It seems like same dance, different tune.
Name calling and blaming everything that goes wrong on your opposition, doesn't help anything. Libs called Bush a dictator. Cons call Obama a dictator. Rhetoric is not fact, but if repeated enough it starts to seem factual. Hitler was a dictator. Kim Jung Ill is a dictator.
Have a blessed day y'all.

Hutch said...

Hey Jazzy

I only sell the best nutmeg available......going price is $125 a gram..satisfaction guarenteed.

You will also find out that by the time you get to be as old as I am your thinking will be..."democrat, republican, independent....they are all in the biz of politics..and it doesn't really matter"
as my brother in law told me years ago..."you can vote Republican and lose all your civil rights or you can vote Democrat and lose all your money" take your choice